There was a little devil
With a big smile on his face,
Whose lack of evil wishes
Made him very out of place.

He went to school for Devils
Where they tried to make him mean,
They tried to make him evil
But the fella wasn’t keen!

They tried to stop him smiling,
But whenever he was seen,
He was certain to be beaming
With his big, wide cheesy grin.

His teacher kept him back one day,
And asked, ‘Why don’t you yearn,
To be evil like the others.
You won’t even try to learn.’

He said, ‘I do not wish to be
An awful, evil brute.
The reason is, that I have learnt,
The chicks prefer us cute!’

Pumpkin Head was mean and fierce,
At least that’s what he thought,
He tried to do the scary things,
His monster class had taught.

He hid beneath the children’s beds
And jumped out late at night,
He’d scream and shout and try so hard
To give these kids a fright.

But every time he tried it,
All the children ever  said,
Was “Wow, check this! A mini guy
With a pumpkin for a head!”

His heart had sank, he felt so low,
‘I don’t know what to do,’ he sighed.
He sat next to a little girl,
And sobbed and wept and cried.

‘I’m trying to be scary,
But you all think I am cute.
How can I be different?
I’m supposed to be a brute!’

‘Don’t cry,’ the child replied to him,
‘You are different,’ she said.
I don’t know of any other
Mini pumpkin heads!

‘But what’s my role in life?’ he asked,
If I cannot give a fright?’
‘With that candle in your head,’ she laughed,
‘You’d make a great night light!’

There was a little witch,
Who was much prettier than most,
Every dead thing fancied her,
The monsters, vampires, ghosts…

With long hair oh so elegant,
And complexion oh so green,
She had but just one tiny flaw…
This witch could not be mean!

She didn’t want to scare people,
She lacked that evil thirst,
She thought people were for cuddling
And should NEVER be cursed

She didn’t have a broom on which
She’d zoom across the sky,
She took the bus, or caught a cab,
She did not ever fly!

She did have her own cauldren though,
But here is something new!
It wasn’t filled with evil,
It was filled with chicken stew!!

A Vampire Unlike Any Other!

There was a mini vampire,
Who was unlike all the rest.
He wasn’t very scary
Though he really tried his best.

For a start, he was so tiny,
Really needed a growth spurt,
And he didn’t want to bite folk
And he didn’t want to hurt.

He didn’t want to go around,
Chomping people dead,
When asked about his favourite meal,
Said chips and garlic bread!

He didn’t cower from a crucifix,
He wasn’t scared of light,
He had no blood around his mouth
His skin was not pale white.

When asked what on this Earth he was
By all the vampire gangs,
He’d say, ‘I’m a little purple smiley guy
Who came equipped with fangs!’

Once upon a pixel time,
There was a pixel ghost,
He was clumsier, less scary
And well, more stupid than most!

They tried to show him lots of tricks,
Like how to walk through walls,
They tried to have him howl and moan
And haunt the mansion halls.

But he just was not interested,
‘This is just so dull,’ he said!
‘If we cannot have any fun,
Then there’s no point in being dead?’

‘You’re a ghost,’ his elders told him,
‘You’re supposed to haunt and prowl.
You’re meant to walk through doors and walls
And moan and scare and howl.’

‘Nah, not me,’ was his reply,
Before leaving their meeting.
‘I’m not hanging around this house,
I’m going trick or treating!’

There was a little monster,
Whose job was to be bad,
But he was just too small to scare folks
And it made him very sad.

The bigger monsters laughed at him,
They said, “There is no role,
For a midget of a monster
Who will never scare a soul!”

He wept and cried and wept some more.
The things they’d said were true
He just could not be frightening,
So what on Earth was he to do?

Then one day he had a Masterplan,
He would not cry again,
He laughed and smiled, the others asked,
“Frank, are you insane?”

“No, I’m not,” came his reply.
“I thought ’bout what you said!”
I know I can’t be frightening,
So I’ll be scary-cute instead!