Yes, you read it right!

Spunky Sperm!

Sally Sperm

Spunky Sperm’s a pleasant guy,
He’s really very nice,
Despite the fact he had a rather
Tricky start to life!

He came out of a whatsit,
Look I can’t be too explicit,
But if you don’t know what I mean,
You really should get with it!

His purpose was to procreate,
Like any of his breed,
He was not there to have a life,
He was meant to be a seed!

But fate had other plans in mind,
And when the pack released,
Spunky fell back from the crowd,
Escaped and headed east.

And so young Spunky, all alone,
Alive and fully grown,
Set about the world that day,
To start a life alone.

And yet, despite that solitude,
So rare among his kind,
He really has developed
Quite a social type of mind.

If you ever come across
Young Spunky in the street,
You’ll see yourself, there’s really not
A nicer sperm to meet!

You can pick up Spunky Sperm from here.

You can get Sally Sperm from here!

Also available at the store in world.

Pumpkin Head was mean and fierce,
At least that’s what he thought,
He tried to do the scary things,
His monster class had taught.

He hid beneath the children’s beds
And jumped out late at night,
He’d scream and shout and try so hard
To give these kids a fright.

But every time he tried it,
All the children ever  said,
Was “Wow, check this! A mini guy
With a pumpkin for a head!”

His heart had sank, he felt so low,
‘I don’t know what to do,’ he sighed.
He sat next to a little girl,
And sobbed and wept and cried.

‘I’m trying to be scary,
But you all think I am cute.
How can I be different?
I’m supposed to be a brute!’

‘Don’t cry,’ the child replied to him,
‘You are different,’ she said.
I don’t know of any other
Mini pumpkin heads!

‘But what’s my role in life?’ he asked,
If I cannot give a fright?’
‘With that candle in your head,’ she laughed,
‘You’d make a great night light!’

There was a little witch,
Who was much prettier than most,
Every dead thing fancied her,
The monsters, vampires, ghosts…

With long hair oh so elegant,
And complexion oh so green,
She had but just one tiny flaw…
This witch could not be mean!

She didn’t want to scare people,
She lacked that evil thirst,
She thought people were for cuddling
And should NEVER be cursed

She didn’t have a broom on which
She’d zoom across the sky,
She took the bus, or caught a cab,
She did not ever fly!

She did have her own cauldren though,
But here is something new!
It wasn’t filled with evil,
It was filled with chicken stew!!

Captain Smurf

Let us tell you about this little fella!

There was once a real tiny guy,
Maybe known as Smurf to you and I,
But inspired by that flick,
Where Depp gets the chick,
Started wearing a patch on his eye!

He started to say things like ‘aaarrr,’
He bought a new ship, sold his car,
Wore an odd hat for leisure,
Started looking for treasure
So inspired was he by that film star.

So one day his blue friends said, ‘Look here,
This behaviour is all very queer!
Papa’s not pleased,
Really thinks you should leave,’
And the lil’ guy let out a huge cheer.

He took his friends’ hands and he shook,
Then he left with an ecstatic look!
Took himself out to sea,
Just as pleased as could be
And he swapped his right hand for a hook.